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LETTERS FROM SKITZO

LETTERS FROM SKITZO

A fiction by M F Korn


It all started with one of those free subscriber ads in the back of FANGORIA magazine:

"C.F. Howell, amateur novelist, wishes epistolary discourse, however antediluvian; author of derivative fanzine, BLUE AND COLD CORPSE; 1011 Tchoupitoulas, New Orleans, LA 70001"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

A reply came from Santa Rojo, California (scribbled hastily on a slip of yellow paper):

Hi cold corpses: Do you mind if we make a song from your name? Its soooo cooooool. Do you listen to THRASHMETAL?

In La where yu are it’s cool. We want to play there!

W. B. Soon Lance Ozone

SKITZO

So C.F.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Howell, amateur novelist wrote back:

"My Dear Skitzo,

Late of the Phantom Empire of Zoth: I would be glad to extend you the use of the title of my dreaded tome, CORPSE. I will take no denial, I found your letter virulently warm and genuine. The thought of my letterbox transom not being empty for the slightest nonce leaves me with rendering joy like lucid singing beltones throughout the aether. I have written a novel, Gershwin's Ghost, a most lengthy manuscript, which I have been unable to sell to the pitched publishers. It is most interesting that something of mine could be woven into the fabric of a song, but I am unfamiliar with that codicil term THRASHMETAL. Is that not the dies irae of a lost restless generation of motley youths with crack pipes, shivs, tire irons and GI Joe dolls?

I remain your oblig'd servant, C.F. Howell"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

A letter came back from Santa Rojo, CA:

(with badly misspelled wordage...)

"To C.F:

How the heck are ya? Lance here! Got your letter a few days ago. I am having fun corrosponding with you! I mean your letters real take the reality away from my mind! It's like a movie. and its actually someone I write to who makes all this up! That's great!! You are a Pro!! It keeps my interist! My mom read a few of your sentences and she reads quite a bit and she thinks you are a great writer. As Slim Pickens in "Blazing saddals" said"you use your toung prettier than a 20 dollar whore"!!

Well its a boring town here! We just got back from touring Texas!!! And WE WASTED OUR BASS PLAYERKELLY GILLIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I used to play with old GI joe dolls! I could never afford his vehicals from "Hazbro" so I made cardboard subs and got messed up in em. I think GI Joe has a happy adventurous life with me as its puppet master ha ha! too bad I didn't have Barbie for the lonely gi blues man! With a scar on his face! He was a tough doll!! I use to write stories for moviessomeday I'll make! I'm sorry I never had the patience to read a real book! My first book I ever read was "Dawn of the Dead" in 1980! I used that book for all my school book reports.

I read Fango and some comix. and I'm a die hard collector of FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND mag! I did do a comix book of KISSmy favorite band in the world, and Alice Cooper.! Some various thrash bands too!! I'm spend 100's on my head doctor to fix me up! It's going ok! I feel like taking a rusty nife and slicing up pretty maddens! But you have to marry them first before you love em to death. And there fathers standing there with dobble barrel shot gun saying "you'll make my little girl real happy!!" (all that was bull, I just tried to make out a story. It was bad I know!! I was more or less copying your writting.)

Till next time, good luck Merry Christmas...

Your demented friend,

Lance Ozone"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

So C.F. Howell wrote back an amusing tome:

"My Dear Skitzo, late of the quivering moons of Mercury:

Did they teach you boys spelling in California? Just Kidding!!! Things are very good here in the crescent city, they are scurrying around through the rubble of the razed cemeteries, pillaging and making enlarged beastly pentagrams. I would like to hear more about your band. My tastes aren't exactly thrashmetal, more Sibelius and Rachmaninov. Enclosed is a tape of "Isle of the Dead", inspired by Arnold Bocklin's famous painting. You gutless wardheelers over there in sunny portocall bay area with your clubs and slam dancing and raping of the land, are sincerely demented no doubt. But I am engaged in the throes of this correspondence because here it is boring also.

I received your drawings. They were all bosh, like most modern art, quite obscene. but then I am drawn like a moth to a flame to the works of Larry Rivers, David Smith, Jackson Pollock. Out there, you probably read various bibliographical journals like Archie Bible Comix, Penthouse Deadmates and other necrophilic sources.

The Kaballa said once Lance writes, that Elizer of Worms is cautious, a man being can be created from the diabolism of Aliester Crowley, no other source admits this, except for Lovecraft's references to the NECRONOMICON, and the mad arab of the attributes and spatial gates...Well I am rambling but I do want to hear from those other urchins of untidy origin, your band buddies, you caustic guitar rendering fools of modern claptrap! Just joking! Now what's this about wasting your bass player? Come again???

Now for a shot of bourbon.

I remain your oblig'd servant, C.F. Howell"

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Then C. F. Howell got a letter from another member of the band:

"Dear C.F.H. Hello sir.

This is Ozzy of the metal band Skitzo. Let me say, your letter was the most hardest, funniest, strangest on I ever received, and we receive quite a bit of mail. Your words you wrote were not clear to me but I understood them! I'm not too hip on big words so I had mom read your letter as well. She reads a lot of books like NECRONOMICON or any H.P Lovecraft but she wanted me to tell you. You write very good. Keep us up to date about your book when it will be reliest. You requested Lance's lirics find them enclose w free sticker again. Basically our lirics if you read them clearly and cleaver enough there is a good old documenty message on the songs! I would send the whole tape w/ music but its not ready yet. I write all music and lirics now that our guitarist Kelly Gillis is out of the band. We killed him. I rewrote all the music lirics stayed!! May I ask how old you are? From the letter you sent ups you made yourself sound like an old sientist that drinks cheap bourbon runs around in a giant gothack castle, and has women slaves or men slaves! (I don't even know if your male or female) chained up. Creating weird creatures in your lab!! Please take this as a compliment! The only writers I've really followed these days are Steve King, Debra Hill, NECRONOMICON and now you, C.F. Howell!!

Please send a copy of your fanzine along with the cost!! I watch many movies do you???

I've seen dawn of the Dead 153 times I've seen Maniac, Blood Feast, 2000 maniacs, Satan's cheerleaders, Driller Killer, Tool Box murders, Love Butcher, Laser Blast. Have you ever seen any of these?? Do you watching underground horror flicks? We really did kill Kelly Gillis, the Bass player, he couldn't play for crap!! I'd better let you get back to your Lab, HAHAHAHA! Just kid'n, except that Kelly Gillis is dead!!! I know my words are sloppy misspelled are some what boring, How can I catch a copy of your book??

Take care C.F.H. see ya pal, Ozzy Skitzo"

PS: any questions? comments? Obsen message??

call (707)599ROCK 12 midnight to 2:30 am Ozzy, Lance and Dirky

-----------------------------------------------------------------

C.F. Howell was stunned so he did not call the number though a few nights he stayed up after trying to write more short shorts, "Rags to Riches to Jupiter", "May I present the Wizard of Gore, Mr. President", "I Married a Star slave", "Oozing Sebaceous Aliens from Venus", "The Dead Member of the Club" and drank much cut rate bourbon and thought about this subject of implied murder, and sat in his hovel. He knew he was thousands of miles away from Santa Rojo and was safe from these monsters. He stayed inside that rent house on Tchoupitoulas street. He picked up his novel once in a while and weighed it mentally and glanced through it thinking about a rewrite and was that assistant editor at TOR books was just being nice when she said he could send it back if rewritten? He couldn't write that second novel , but his epistolary discourse a la Lovecraft was amazingly aplenty. But should he write to these cretins anymore?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Dear Skitzo, of Imperial Rome, 7th Death Pyre:

Thank you boys for being so prompt with your wicked preponderance of the dread monster murder which the muck meet its feet on, jealous and green with envy! I received a tape of your group. The words "hellishly pyrrhic" are in the fore as far as your accusation of murdering one Kelly Gillis. My tolerance for such raucous soporific schlock is ebbing. Your lyrics (lirics) are unusually sadistic, have you a meat cleaver at the ready for your parade of ghoulish fans and dreadlocked zombie groupies? Exactly how did you get rid of your bass player? I have had much trouble meeting a female rendition of Byronic beauty to whom I can quote Rimbaud. A vision of splendor is what your aged grandsire requires. Do you know of what I speak? Quivering bundles of nerves would be the term used to describe the coursing of my synaptical processes within the loblolly paddock of this mawkish existence. I have written two new short stories and am enclosing a fanzine, THE BLUE AND COLD CORPSE, as you requested. How it will quench that thirst for stench. California is truly a Gore Vidal dreamlike iridescent montage of mondo youths on the sly, juvenile delinquents and girls a plenty. Crimes rampant o'er hill and valley, the dreaded cemetery and boneorchard smell quaking in the morass of foggy banks, dead and dismembered ranks of your devoted fans and ex musicians of skitzo. Tell me, have you ever heard "Le Sacre Du Printemps"?

I thinke not. Just kidding. I don't mean to be philistine or patronizing my dear Skitzo. If you guys ever tour over here don't come and visit me in the Big Easy! You supposedly waste inefficient musicians and all I know how to play is Ragtime. Mardi Gras is the time for carnal lusts and the seven deadly sins, but not any new ones, like MURDER!!!! I myself have had to lock up my Aunt Sadie because of this!! I remain your most obedient servant, Quid Dulcius on the backside!

C.F. Howell And another misspelled response from the hellishness of Santa Rojo, California: Yo Howell!! Lance Here! Whutzup! Nothing here but hellish hicks from hades, sissor happy bastards!! Oh well, hey you said you went to Mardi Grawsdid you like it? I saw movie called EASY RIDER and the Mardi Graw was filmed! You asked about SKITZO's touring??Well we played about 50 to 60 concerts in past 10 yearsnot much but we went threw a lot of musicians. We were set to play in CANADA Dec 29th but the customs bullshit would cost $2000 buxI didn't have!! So in the summer we are set to play San Francisco, Los Angeles, Arizona, Texas (San Antonio)! Oh this girl in TX I gave yo address to !! She is different yet so cool!! (Yes foxy she is) but she not air headed!! Anyway we are trying to come to New Orleans and Lafayette, Baton Rouge, Jackson, MISS! We play SF Oakland quite a bit! And High Schools! It's funny cause when we'd play high schools I'd throw up the school's colors to show we have spirit (happy face drawn!) I'm seriously involved in FX. I got in touch w Berman studios and several others they are very interested. I'm making a demo video for me regurgitating with control. What I mean by control is I can force the vomit out in one big heave or I can ooze is slowly and wave my toung around and the vomit spews all over. (enclosed was a polaroid of a twentyish long haired youth holding a guitar with gobs of blue jellylike fake vomit spewing out of his mouth with a wicked expression, a countenance of sheer maniacal horror a la Manson). Hey pal don't get sick on mecause you asked!! When I was born I was meant to be famouscult following or even major publicity would mean bux!!!! How's Aunt Sadie doing in her basement, she's not too tied up these days is she? Give her my love, hee hee . Hey I'm sorry about the lushus babes not writting yet. What I'll do is next time I meat them in person is ill play out the movie "Bloodsucking Freaks" and if you saw it about the girl who wouldn't dance for master!! Same thing with writting for master, I'll have to cut off her hands on stage, and my little slave midgit is a sadistic son of a gun. You don't even want to know what he does!! Don't get pissed off, I will get you free backstage pass let me know when we play Louisiana. You can make fun of us being not educated. PS: I'm a fan of ELVIRA, are you??? Friends and Chainsaws Lance from SKITZO”

_________________________________________________________________

Now a response from that Lovecraftian scholarfake from Tchoupitoulas Street, C. F. Howell, who kept putting off that second novel for stupid little first drafty short shorts about aliens landing at science fiction conventions, and comics who do friars conventions in outer space, with the lovecraftian endings "ARGGHHH, Chaos Ngarlathotep, and Yog Suthoth, the goat of a thousand young..." Too much blase' correspondence from a person who thought he was Norman Mailer and Faulkner rolled up in one... Maybe it's because he felt superior to his correspondents...like SKITZO... He thought he would give them a sample of his horror craft in this one: My Dear Skitzo, Malik Sultan: I received your letter. Now the previous letters from you and Ozzy indicate ambivalence about whether you guys are putting me on. What is all this about killing your Bass player? Why would you do that?

I know my last letter could probably be ascertained as the weirdest mondo one of the bunch, we may be literally repelling each other, especially me to you guys stalking the closed McDonalds in Santa Rojo. I am really not so much interested in blue vomit coursing through your esophagus. Seriously, what is going on in that state of mind called Cal. It is superb that you are getting involved in F/X. I saw "Toxic Avenger," it was good cheap punk fodder. Now: You see, I was walking through the crisp autumnal air, the cool air of tombs vaporizing the dew on the freshly manicured graveyard, a double matrix of dead bodies. It was after midnight, all soul's hour, and there was a large looming beastcat in the road howling in a voice that seemed to me the essence of satanic witchcraft itself, which any mortal man would fear. The cat howled near the reeking sewage ditches aligning the road that split the graveyard into two architectural sections.

When I came upon it I noticed a longhaired spindly creature hobbling through a back section of the graves, a mottled countenance that almost made me shriek out loud with horror, I could hear the eerie dissonant chords of the Magic Pipe of Erich Zann harmonizing in the very aether itself. Suddenly the ominous figure came forward in the blackness, it had a strange mechanism around it's bulbous suppurating death's head skull, and wore a cloak of night that swaddled the horrendous torso, as it came forward still more.

My heart started beating, I had heard something to the effect that there was a nightstalker at large. An escapee from the Hammond State school, a man with no conscience, who had already mutilated twenty coeds after killing them, munching hungrily upon their flesh, as if he were in a nightmarish geek house of the damned. I shuddered with a cry of helplessness as the grotesque figure in the darkness came upon me, then ten yards away. I would probably now be throttled about the neck, until dead, a limp corpse who could breathe no more. In my head, I delineated nothing but fear in the foggy night.

The misfit's voice tuned up and cackled:

"Hi dude, I'm Lance Skitzo. I'm just listening to some tunes, have you ever heard the "Night of the Living Dead" soundtrack whilst walking through a boneorchard?" You see, it was you, with a silly walkman bejeweling your skull. I breathed a sigh of relief and walked homeward, only to be hit in the lungs with a gardening tool by my vicious Aunt Sadie who was just released from the snakepit sanitarium...

Enough of that weirdness, unless you want more,

I remain your oblig'd servant,

C.F. Howell And a response:

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Dear C.F. Howell:

I'm going to trust you for not telling on us. We did kill Kelly Gillis that last time we were in Texas. He was talking bad really heavy, and Ozzy starting hitting him. We were so messed up on crystal meth (we took too many ones,) and that he was crying and screaming and we didn't know better. We were camping in the dessert and when Kelly was lying there, Ozzy and Dirky started stabbing him. I guess they had scene ED GINE films too much. Kelly was just a hope to die coke and alcohol and pothead but we like him. But he didn't like us, he was evil, and then Ozzy said what do we do now? They were cutting his body up with a big cleaver, and machete. We put his body parts in a bloody heap. You have to promise not to tell anybody or we will be real mad. He wasn't the first one we got rid of, we have been threw a lot of musicians. We want to be like MOTORHEAD, Millie of CREATOR, and from Canada, VOIVOID and EXCITER and VENOM and MERCYFUL FATE from Denmark, there is quite a bit of big underground bands that I met and KNow. I dought you even hear of half these bands huh? Texas is near Louisiana. Don't mind me, "OK I'm just getting worried!!!

HA HA. I will send you a new tape with our new guitarist (Timmy Crowhurst), its much more cleaver than that last tape. Oh same songs but few different rhythms and much tighter sounding. I'll send it as soon as it's done? Well take care. C.F. Send another zine they are god!

PS; call (707)599ROCK 12 mid to 2:30 am Ozzy, Lance, Dirk, bye your friends Lance and SKITZO!!!!!!

-----------------------------------------------------------------

A frantic reply from CF Howell:

Dear Lance, Late of Skitzo, Wipeout Guitarist:

Okay... you are kidding right? I really can't tell. As for me, I am a sentient creature resembling Jello who dines on the mutilated torsos of kids found at the mall, with four appendages of murky stench unparalleled since the days of charnel houses and glue factories and dog mulch. I have a slight birthmark running from my harelip to the amazing flat subordinal ridge near the vigamatic arches of my little eyeballs, and I lost my legs in an alligator attack whilst swimming for plankton in the cesspool in Amite. My face is offset by my webbed feet and instead of arms I have two little appendages that stick right out of my armpits. I used to be a geek in a freak show tent revival, I used to tour the states selling adrenalin snake oil from ripped out spleens of small boys. And yes, I used to eat glands myself.

Have you ever been circumcised with a McCullough chainsaw? I am dwelling into the Kaballa and the dreaded NECRONOMICON that the mad arab gleaned from centuries of ancient lineage and beyond, back before Jesus was playing street ball and Julius Caesar was slamdancejerking down at the vomitorium. Et Tu Brute? I've really got to go, write soon. Tell those babes to write your aged grandsire!

PS:

I showed your letter to some friends of mine. Just for laughs. I know I am out of it, but you guys have the weirdest stories. They saw it and laughed. I really like you guys, I like your music tape you sent after I got the letter. Please say you are kidding about that mutilated corpse, KELLY GILLIS. And any other ineffective musicians. That is really a bad way to get a good band together, don't you think? HA HA.

I remain your obliged servant, C.F. Howell

Before he got a reply from SKITZO, he went to the college library and did some research on newspapers from the Texas area. He saw something that made him want to retch immediately... small articles...

"The mutilated remains of a teenager were fou nd on Highway 36 near Brownsville, repeatedly stabbed. Authorities identify the victim, a caucasian, Kelly M. Gillis of Santa Rojo, CAL." What C.F. Howell found in his mailbox two weeks later made his heart lurch. It was a letter from Skitzo: Lance, Ozzy Dirk and Timmy.

He opened it up:

There were old photos, polaroids of some entrails, arms, legs cleaved and hewed to the bone, separated. A highway, with Lance Ozone (he recognized him from the blue vomit photo) smiling, and two other long haired freaks, holding machetes and bloody knives.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

THE POSTMARK WAS FROM HOUSTON, TEXAS!! All the letter said was this:

Dear dead one, C.F., late of Tchoupitoulas street, New Orleans: We told you not to tell anybody! We are touring now, heading east since last tuesday. We are coming threw texas, then Louisiana, playing clubs. We know where you live!!!!

This is what I have to say for you, C.F . Howell:

These are our lyrics for BLUE AND COLD CORPSE:

THEE I INVOKE, SERPENT OF THE DEEP IN THE NAME OF OUR FATHER ENKI, BEFORE THE FLIGHT, LORD AND MASTER, OPEN THE GATE, LEST I ATTACK IT LEST I LEAP OVER IT BY FORCE PLUMED SERPENT OF THE DEEP, NINNGHIZZHIDA, LORD NEBO, WHO DOES NOT KNOW OF THY MAGICK? WHAT SPIRIT IS NOT COMPELLED BY THE MAGICK OF THY SPELLS?

OPEN THE GATE TO THE SPHERE OF THY SPIRIT NEBO KURIOS OPEN THE GATE TO THE SPHERE OF THY WORKINGS OPEN TO ME? IA ATHZUL IA I BOL IA GAKU! MARZ ZI FOAS KAN! NEB ANATOS KPA! IA GAS! IA GAH! IA KAKOMANI! IA MAAI!

(Preliminary invocation of the calling of the spirits of the dead who dwell in Cutha, of the Lost, the Book of Calling.) He had his copy of the NECRONOMICON that he bought in B. Dalton; these kids' newest song was rife with the stuff.

The letter continued...

We are going to get you...You shuuda shut up! We've been threw a lot of musicians this way, and now you, C.f. Howell! We are gonna get rusty nife and slice off your hands and yure feet and yure head! And maybe we are gonna eat your mutilated FLESH!!!!!!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's what it said. He knew it had been a big mistake all along. Why had he bothered to keep writing? They were on their way, they were probably in Louisiana! Darn! There would be a knock on the door soon. He would pack and leave, go over to his comic book buddy's apartment. Yeah! These grisly punks were supernatural, he thought. He heard a knock on the door, followed by more. He freaked. There was banging and hammering with fists, and yells and screams of a stygian nature.

"Lance here, you COLD CORPSE C.F. HOWELL!"

He knew they had heard his stereo, Rachmaninoff's "Isle of the Dead" had been blasting away. Rotten luck...the door was giving way.

SKITZO had arrived, as timely as their letters.

THE END

About MF Korn

M.F. KORN

A lifelong resident of Louisiana,  M.F. Korn writes sortofsurreal dark fantasy, quiet weird horror and strange science fiction. He is the author of twelve novels, two screenplays and two hundred and forty five short stories.

M.F. Korn Catalog visit here now!

A short story “The Strange Case of the Lovecraft Café” cowritten with DF Lewis and Jeff VanderMeer was mentioned in The Year’s Best Fantasy & Horror: Twenty First Annual Edition.

 

His webpage is http://mfkorn.com.

 

His literary blog is http://www.mfkorn.blogspot.com

 

His myspace page is http://www.myspace.com/mfkorn

 

His facebook page is http://www.facebook.com/mf.korn

 

His twelfth novel, CREATURE FEATURE February 2010, co-written with David Mathew of Britain.


 About THE AUTHOR of twelve novels and 240 published stories:

Three of MF Korn's books, CONFESSIONS OF A GHOUL AND OTHER STORIES, and ALIENS, MINIBIKES AND OTHER STAPLES OF SUBURBIA, and also SKIMMING THE GUMBO NUCLEAR were mentioned in The Year's Best Fantasy & Horror: Fifteenth Annual
Collection. CONFESSIONS OF A GHOUL AND OTHER STORIES was mentioned in The Mammoth Book Of Best New Horror edited by Stephen Jones. RACHMANINOFF'S GHOST was also mentioned in The Mammoth Book Of Best New Horror edited the following year.
 

Korn's twelfth novel, CREATURE FEATURE cowritten with David Mathew of Britain is going through required rewrites by a publisher. The cover has not been chosen yet. Currently they are at work on another novel via correspondence. He just finished writing a screenplay with another writer who just got a movie deal on another project. He turned over the first draft to his coauthor who is to do a second draft.In other news, Korn's four books with Silverlake press are out of print in paperback but available in Kindle or as ebooks at Fictionwise and most ebook outlets.

 

NOVELS AND COLLECTIONS:


SWAMP WITCH PIQUANTE AND SCREAM QUEEN BISQUE

 

(OUT OF PRINT IN PAPERBACK, AVAILABLE IN KINDLE, EBOOK)

By M.F. Korn

Format: Cover art by Jason Just
$13.95
Horror Collection
196 pages
63,900 words

 

ORDER at Amazon.com for 11.16. Or $12.55 at Barnes and Noble.

Two short novels.

In "The White Trash Witches Coven", Keith Ogden accidentally meets a witch in a SuperUsavMart. When she invites him to join the coven, he accepts, thinking of fun sorceries and lots of whammies. The gaggle of chatty women he encounters severely disappoints, with their baby pictures, recipes, and addictions to trashy afternoon TV. Is this "coven" just a group of wannabes, or is something more sinister lurking underneath the chicken grease?

In "Pavane for a Scream Queen", Jeff Vincent, freelance writer for Filmland Magazine and asofyetundiscovered novelist, has landed the interview of a lifetime with cult favorite Aurora Sterling, scream queen of the 1950's classic Bmovies. But when Dame Aurora cancels and those who worked with her die or go into hiding, Jeff finds himself in the middle of a mystery. What is the secret behind this gorgeous, elegant woman? Is it just Hollywood hype, or something else much older and eternal?

RACHMANINOFF'S GHOST


(OUT OF PRINT IN PAPERBACK, AVAILABLE IN KINDLE, EBOOK)


Available at Amazon.com for 10.36. Available at Shocklines bookstore, it's available at Barnes and Noble for 11.65.


Product Details:

Format: Paperback, 160pp.
ISBN:1931095418
Publisher: Silverlake Publ
Pub. Date: January   2003

Korn's first horror novel, Rachmaninoff's Ghost, (51,000 words, 160 pp) written eighteen years ago.
History: Sold to Papercapers, resold to Silverlake Publishing:   Silverlake under new mgt, resold again to Silverlake publishing.

A blandishment about Korn's first novel written eighteen years ago:

"...Michael Korn has fed upon Poe, Lovecraft and Richly Sinewed Music, but above all upon  himself! I thought the first twothirds of RACHMANINOFF'S GHOST splendid, but its last third of Jungian nightmare literally took my head off. If Korn's photo is not on the front of TIME magazine, as a result, injustice will sure be done..." D.F. Lewis

ALL THE MUTANT TRASH IN ALL THE GALAXIES four novels by M. F. Korn

 

ORDER at Amazon.com for 11.87. Or $14.49 at Barnes and Noble.

A collection of four novels by M F Korn, describing lovesick stalkers, synthetic tramps, abused robots, conmen, robber barons, oilfield and nuclear blue collar workers offworld, schizophrenic aliens, video outlaws, rednecks, thieves, indentured androids, barflies, pharmaceutical overlords, squatters, smut merchants. Each novel has a separate introduction from one of these writers: D.F. Lewis, Sherry Decker, Jeffrey Thomas, H Chimera (book size: approx 145,000 words).

Four novels by M. F. Korn
ORDER at Amazon.com for 11.87. Or $14.49 at Barnes and Noble.

The Man Who Loved in Light Years (a very early first SF novel): A drugaddled philosophy professor stalks a pheromoned person through known space.
Movietone Mars: Cinema is illegal—Movie stars purged—everyone has his own television show.
Tilting Planet (The Trouble with Xenodes): Terran shrinks sent to cure schizophrenic artistic alien race, but who caused the outbreak?
Galactic Smut Merchants: Alien payperview –something new for grunts on mining planets—But could they conquer the Terran payperview market?

SKIMMING THE GUMBO NUCLEAR
Out by Eraserhead Press. Available at Barnes and Noble and Amazon. Available at Shocklines bookstore. Regular Price $16.95. At Amazon for $11.87.

Format: Paperback, 292pp.
ISBN: 0971357269
Publisher: Eraserhead Press
Pub. Date: November  2001

A grand epic wasteland of surreal pandemic plague. Pollution quotient in the southern delta nether regions of the state of Louisiana, the dustbin of the Mississippi river and the nation, whose motto is the "Sportsman's Paradise", a paradisio of colorful denizens all grappling for a slice of lassez bon temps roule, "let the good times roll", but now all are grappling for their very lives. Nature had to fight back sooner or later, and now what will happen to this tourist state gone amuck with middleages plague?

ISBN: 0971357269 — 292 PAGES — Regular Price $16.95. At Amazon for $11.87. 14.95 at Shocklines.

Confessions of a Ghoul and Other Stories

(OUT OF PRINT IN PAPERBACK, AVAILABLE IN KINDLE, EBOOK)


Format: Paperback, 122pp.
ISBN: 1931095175
Publisher: Silver Lake Publishing
Pub. Date: January  2001

Order from (at 10.75)Barnes and Noble,   (11.95) or from Amazon. 9.56 or (11.95) at Shocklines bookstore.

Introduction by D. F. Lewis Cover art by Lawrence D. P. Miller Trade Paperback $11.95 CD $9.95 Disk $5.95 Download $3.95 Horror Collection 120 pages 50,000 words

Aliens, Minibikes and Other Staples of Suburbia

(OUT OF PRINT IN PAPERBACK, AVAILABLE IN KINDLE, EBOOK)


Format: Paperback, 114pp.
ISBN: 1931095272
Publisher: Silver Lake Publishing
Pub. Date: January  2001
.

Out in paperback (at 14.95) at Amazon(11.95). Available at Barnes and Noble. 14.95
"While reading, you'll be picked up and dropped straight into your own history while visiting various, imaginary neighborhoods...It's nostalgia at its finest."
Sherry Decker, from the Introduction 

"M. F. Korn's richly detailed, highly idiosyncratic portraits of America call to mind a Bradbury on magic mushrooms...he's a Norman Rockwell speaking in tongues with a voodoo doll in one hand and a flaming paintbrush in the other."        Jeffrey Thomas, author of Punktown 

Trade Paperback $11.95 CD $9.95 Disk $5.95 Download $3.95 Speculative Fiction Collection 114 pages 47,000 words

DIE EARTHMAN DIE: TALES OF HORROR AND SF 34 STORIES OF HORROR AND SCIENCE FICTION

by Cosmic Eyeball Press
Order at Amazon.com or Barnes and Noble.


Cover art by Rafael Maza
$16.40
Horror and Science Fiction Collection
ISBN 1411641299
Cosmic Eyeball Press
270 pages
80,451 words


Thirty Four Stories by Four Talents in the Horror / Science Fiction Field
* DF Lewis Winner of the British Fantasy Award and 1500 stories, editor, Nemonymous
* M Philbin author of 100 stories and several novels
* David Mathew former reviewer, Interzone; author, several novels, 400 stories
* MF Korn Louisiana author of twelve novels and 240 short stories

The Less Fashionable Side of the Galaxy
by M. F. Korn, D. F. Lewis, and H
Chimera $2.25, 24 pages

NO ISBN

From Eraserhead Press. Order from Shocklines bookstore.
Three masters of bizarre speculation combine
talents to create five experimental tales of insane fiction. Featuring M. F. Korn, author of Skimming the Gumbo Nuclear, H Chimera, author of SZMONHFU, and the king of the weirdmongers, D. F. Lewis.

The White Trash Witches' Coven

 Tanjen Ltd, Paperback, April, 99: CANCELED. Sold to Gargadillo, CANCELED. SOLD. Even Shakespeare had his "Pericles"...

 

Movietone Mars: Hartwick Electronic Press, 1994
Translated into Russian after was sold to Baziat Literary Agency in 1993, Russia CANCELED. 

The Trouble with Xenodes (Tilting Planet), serialized, Weird Stories

The Man Who Loved in Light Years: D&S Associates, (Electronic) 1994

Galactic Smut Merchants, Tanjen, Ltd. paperback, 2000
CANCELED. 

 

Alone Against a Revolution

Golden Meteorite Press,
hardback, 1997, Library Binding 89 pages (August 1, 1996) Golden Meteorite Press Limited; ISBN: 1895385539

 

 

Stygian Relics of the Lachrymose

Golden Meteorite Press, limited edition. 1998 Hardback collection of short stories:  Library Binding 178 pages (January 1, 1998) Golden Meteorite Press Limited; ISBN: 1895385636

 

The Spectral Carnival Show and Other Stories

Golden Meteorite Press, 1998, limited edition,  Library Binding 140 pages (January 1, 1998) Golden Meteorite Press Limited; ISBN: 189538561X

 


Pavane for a Scream Queen, SOLD.

SHORT STORY ACCEPTANCES:

  • Two to Vision Magazine
  • Tome
  • Dark Tome
  • FEAR magazine
  • Forty stories in P L
  • Potent Aphrodisiac
  • Sweet Dreams Baby
  • LeftFooted Wombat
  • a mag named "VPulp"
  • A forgotten small mag out of New York City
  • 2 to Premonitions
  • Zero Hour
  • Killer Frog Anthology
  • Spider Eyes
  • Fast Lizard
  • Lost
  • Genrere
  • Cacophony
  • Cacophony Hardback Anthology
  • Project Mars
  • Two to Razor
  • Two to Blue Lady
  • Seven to Silver Shadows
  • Two to Taler's Tale
  • The Ultimate Unknown
  • Hundredth Anniversary Lovecrafter
  • Louisiana State University magazine Delta
  • Sixteen stories to Fading Shadows Pulps
  • Weird Stories
  • Startling Science Stories
  • Forbidden Lines
  • a few to House of Pain
  • Cosmic Visions
  • Midnight Gallery
  • Classic Pulp Stories
  • DREAD
  • Artstar Journal
  • Northern Fusion
  • Sinister
  • Dark Corridors (can't confirm)
  • Australian paperback AntipodeanSF
  • LC39
  • A few to Brazilian magazine Megalon
  • Iconoclastia (wordhunger)
  • Words (mag whose charity is London's St. Mary's Hospital)
  • 3AM Publishing (wordhunger)
  • Winedark Sea paperback (Vol 3) w/ DF Lewis and H Chimera
  • The Dream People Chapbook
  • Five stories to Gathering Darkness w/ DF Lewis and H Chimera
  • Grail paperback anthology w/ DF Lewis and H Chimera
  • The Ministry of Whimsy
  • EOTU
  • 21st Century Bitch Goddess
  • Imaginary Worlds (wordhunger)
  • SteelCaves
  • Spooky's F.O.D. w/ DF Lewis
  • Ministry of Whimsy (also a review of GHOUL Collection)
  • Driver's Side Airbag w/ H himera
  • Three stories with H Chimera to REDSINE paperback anthologies
  • Alternate Species (w/ Dave Mathew and H Chimera)
  • EGENRE
  • Planetmag
  • Apocalypse Fiction Magazine w/ H Chimera
  • Thomas Deja's Underworlds Anthology w/ H Chimera and Dave Mathew
  • Three to UNDERWORLDS w/ H Chimera
  • another to The Dream People w/ H Chimera
  • another to UNDERWORLDS w/ DF Lewis and H Chimera
  • sale to German May2002 anthology SPLATTERPUNK:A NEW GENERATION w/ H Chimera
  • The Dream Zone w/ Dave Mathew
  • another to Apocalypse Fiction magazine w/ H Chimera
  • HORRORFIND
  • The Storyville Anthology
  • Eleven story run of "Eli" series to Apocalypse Fiction w/ H Chimera
  • Frightwriters, w/ DF Lewis and H Chimera
  • story w/ Dave Mathew to "Flesh and Hunger" anthology
  • Five stories at Tland horror site
  • sale to Muse Apprentice Guild
  • sale to Thomas Deja's Amicus paperback anthology
  • wrote dozens of stories w/ DF Lewis, a collective called WORDHUNGER (collection now w/ Double Dragon Books)
  • sale to anthology GHOSTBREAKERS: Sinister Sleuths (w/ Dave Mathew and H Chimera)
  • sale to Thomas Deja's anthology about Warren Zevon
  • sale to Cpulp Halloween paperback anthology
  • article for Wicked Writers Carnival
  • sale to "Trip the Light Horrific" anthology(w/ H Chimera)
  • sale to "Travel a Time Historic" anthology
  • sale to "Grave Tappings" anthology
  • sale to "Mind Scraps" anthology
  • sale to "Vintage Wine: Werewolves and Vampires" anthology
  • sale to Scattered, Smothered, Covered anthology, collab w/ Jeff VanderMeer and DF Lewis
  • sale to RED SCREAM (w/ David Mathew)
  • sale to "NEW WRITINGS IN THE FANTASTIC" anthology(w/ H Chimera RIP)
  • sale of "Weird Western" story collab w/ DF Lewis to DEVIL'S GULCH paperback anthology
  • sale to DEAD ENDS Anthology by Screaming Dreams Publ
  • reprint of collab w/ Jeff VanderMeer and DF Lewis in German collection by J VanderMeer
  • reprint of collaboration "The Strange Case of the Lovecraft Cafe" (mentioned in Year's Best Horror: 21st Annual Edition) w/ Jeff VanderMeer and DF Lewis in A SURGEON'S TALE
  • Twisted Twins
  • German: Masters of Unreality anthology
  • NVH Magazine
  • Fear On Demand Podcast Edited by Sidney Williams


MARGINALIA:

  • Eleven volumes of Epistolary Discourse

  • A screenplay, "The Revival Theatre"

  • Best Stories of the Year by P L Mag, 1998

  • Honorable Mention by the Soft Science Fiction Writers Association
    for story "The Old Man and the Cyborg" , 1996

  • Won a category of Killer Frog Contest, approx. 1992

  • Best Stories of the Year by P L Mag, 1990


  • M F Korn's books are at Fictionwise, Double Dragon Books, and ebook outlets.

 

Have The Dead Spoken To You Lately?

Lisa Lee Harp Waugh The Great American Necromancer

Real Zombies, the Living Dead, and Creatures of the Apocalypse

Real Zombies, the Living Dead, and Creatures of the Apocalypse
By Brad Steiger

BUY IT HERE NOW!

 

 


What is regarded as the most haunted scariest place on Earth to see a real ghost?

MANY HAVE THEIR MINDS SET TO WHAT IS AND WHAT ISN'T HAUNTED

THE MOST HAUNTED PLACE ON EART

So come with us now as the spirits of past and ghosts stories are revisited through the most haunted places in the world where haunted dark shadows linger and fright is king.

Whitechapel, Sloss Furnace, Spittalfields, London East End, London, England, Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, AuschwitzBirkenau Concentration Camp, Oswiecim, Poland, Amityville, NY, or the Waverly Ghosts of the Kentucky Sanatorium, Bachelor's Grove, Bald Mountain Or The entire Haunted City of New Orleans. It's all up to conjecture... Haunted America Tours lets People who visit the site vote to see what they believe is the most haunted location, other paranormal sites, and television shows pick and choose their haunted places for you.

THIS STORY MAY JUST PUT A NEW REAL HAUNTED HOTSPOT ON YOUR LIST OF REAL SCARY AND MOST HAUNTED PLACES TO INVESTIGATE!

TO READ MORE PLEASE VISIT HERE NOW!


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REAL HAUNTED DOLLS ~ JUST A SIMPLE CHILD'S TOYS?

 

EXCLUSIVE NEW FEATURED ARTICLES
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Gina Lanier: HAUNTED BY A REAL GHOST AND YOU DON'T KNOW IT!
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Troy Taylor Your Host To The Real Ghost Of Haunted America
Divining Ghosts, Dowsing Rods And Pendulums
Jeff Belanger Author, Lecturer, And One Of The Very Best Paranormal Investigators Around Today
Top 10 ghost hunting tips for the Professional Paranormal Investigator....
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Keith Age The Real Ghost Man Of Louisville, Kentucky
PATRICK BURNS The Ghostgeek
Dr. Hans Holzer, The Godfather to the American Paranormal Movement
10 Real Paranormal Investigation or Ghost Hunting Myths
Lake Champlain's famous monster "Champ"
The Most Haunted Man In America Could It Be, John Zaffis
Elvis' Ghost Has Entered The Building
2008 THE YEAR OF THE BIGFOOT Todays Updated News
THE GATE OF HELL Is Never Closed The Seven Gates Of Hell
Giving Up The Ghost! The Upside Of A Paranormal Investigation Gone Wrong.
What A Real Hungry Ghost Can, Will And Really Do ... Just To You!
HUNGRY GHOST: A WHOLE MONTH DEALING WITH UNPLEASENT FAMILY GHOST
The Dead Do Cry Out Because It's Hungry Ghost Month at Lily Dale
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Patti Starr Scares Me To Death!
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Hungry Ghost Month August The Month Of Death!
Real Hungry Ghost Month Taboos and Ghost Photos
ScareFest 2008
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The One The Only The Incomparable Patti Starr: Answers Your Questions
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The Dead Do Phone Home
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Real Myrtles Plantation Ghost Photos
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The Queens Of The American Witch
The Mirrored World Beyond
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PREDICTIONS FROM THE DEAD
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The Real Scent Of A Ghost!
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Confessions of a Ghost Hunter
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This Month we feature Christopher Balzano, teacher and folklorist living in the Boston area. He has been investigating the unknown for twelve years and running Massachusetts Paranormal Crossroads, a website dedicated to the paranormal and local folklore of Massachusetts, for more than five. His writing has appeared in such respected publications as “The Haunted Times” and “Mystery Magazine” as well as “Unexplained Paranormal Magazine.” His investigations have been covered by “The Boston Globe”, “The Boston Herald”, “The Standard Times” and “Worchester Magazine” and he has been asked to speak about urban legends and the paranormal at conferences throughout New England. He is a regular on several paranormal radio shows, including “The Ghost Chronicles” and “Spooky Southcoast” and has appeared in documentaries and television specials on the supernatural. He was one of the featured writers in Jeff Belanger’s Encyclopedia of Haunted Places and contributed to the collection Weird Hauntings and the soon to be released, Weird Massachusetts. His writing and research have also been featured in Thomas D’Agostino’s Haunted New Hampshire and Haunted Massachusetts and the recently released Ghostly Tails from America’s Jails. Read More Here!

THE HAUNTED MUSEUM ENTER HERE NOW IF YOU DARE
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GHOST TOURS ACROSS AMERICA
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HOW TO MAKE A GHOST REPORT
HOW TO START YOUR OWN GHOST TOUR
HOW TO BECOME A REAL GHOST HUNTER
Paranormal Investigators Directory... PLEASE VISIT HERE

HAUNTED AMERICA TOURS Official Web Site is a ghost tour information site; our information is only as reliable as readers' contributed ghost and haunted reports. We assume no credit for your adventures, and accept no liability for your misadventures. Use common sense. Read our ghost hunting recommendations. Before visiting any "haunted" site, verify the location, accessibility, safety, and other important information. Never trespass on private and/or posted property without permission from the proper authorities.

At HauntedAmericaTours.com we invite you into our Ghost Haunted Paranormal world where art, News stories, photography and the unexplained merge into a new landscape that will leave you truly spellbound. HauntedAmericaTours.com is a continuous work in progress; we will keep it updated for you on a regular basis, so that you can come back and see a ghost or two, and meet some new ones. HAUNTED AMERICA TOURS is not responsible for the content of external internet sites.

HauntedAmericaTours.com is a continuous work in progress; we will keep it updated for you on a regular basis, so that you can come back and see a ghost or two, and meet some new ones. Please browse here and find what your looking for. Check out the other Categories and featured new articles about everything in the paranormal community today. And also enjoy your very haunted adventures safely.

We want to thank all the contributors, visitors and many regular readers that make hauntedamericatours.com so great! We couldn't have done it without you! If you haven't checked us out yet, what are you waiting for?

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